The Girl Who (Probably) Liked Me

So for those of you following at home, I've spoken in this blog recently about being a teenager and my deficiencies as a human. I've spoken about how inhuman I seem to be and my ability to disgust and bemuse pretty much anyone. But there is always an exception to prove the rule. Something which happened recently reminded me of someone from high school. A girl who actually did (probably) seem to like me.

It was year 10, in 99 and I had landed one of the lead roles in the school production. A musical set in the 60's, my character was a Russian Spy and probably the best (certainly funniest) character in the show. A lass called Sarah, a few years my senior, was my sidekick. She was the brains and I got to be the loveable fool. A role that I seem to adopt in every day life, I might add. So anyway, this was a big school production for the year and a lot was involved from the cast and also the music students. Somebody thought it'd be a good idea to bring us all down somewhere (I honestly don't remember where, but it wasn't too far away) for a weekend camp. The music students had their activities and we had our own, for bonding, practising and whatnot. Of course we'd all come together for other things.

High school camps are always eye openers. For the students it's the perfect opportunity to cause as much trouble and mischief as they can possibly muster. I kind feel sorry for the teachers, but something tells me they were probably sat in one of their own dorm rooms late at night with a bottle of whiskey. Anyway so we'd all been shuffled off to this camp. We were thrown into form rooms which had about four of five bunk beds. The guys had their dorms all in one block and on the far side of the campground the girls had theirs. I honestly can't remember what on Earth we did for most of the camp. Us actors certainly didn't practise any of our lines or work on our blocking. Or if we did it was so minimal that I can barely remember it. I know for a fact the music guys did have to shuffle off fairly often and practise. I suppose the music teacher was more organised and full on than the drama teacher, who was fairly laid back.

But it was Saturday night that stands out in my mind. We'd all been shuffled into our dorms for the night. Of course none of us could possibly sleep. You know what these situations are like. Everyone is in bed talking absolute shit to one another. Playing absurd games which involve answering intimate questions about ones self. There's always a few guys who are shuffling about. Everybody is restless. Outside a teacher passed by every few minutes. We could see his body blocking the light which came in through the windows. We'd all fall silent upon his passing and then resume shortly after when we figured it was safe to do so. Every now and then we'd all stop dead even though we couldn't see a shadow, convinced the teacher had been wily enough to sneak up on us. Getting caught messing about on these things was usually pretty serious and often involved suspension.

But we were young and clearly insane and the teachers were old and tired, as they often are. Soon the sentry didn't return. It wasn't long afterwards that the night truly came alive. It was interesting for me, to observe the progression from a quiet night outside where everything was still, to the chaos that unfolded. It began with the sound of footsteps on pavement, dashing past our dorms. Soon there were giggles from not too far away. Then whispers. Then talking and more laughing and even more giggles still. The girls had emerged as had many of the boys. One of the girls who played the main character and was in year 12 burst open our door. She came inside and told us of the wonders going on in the camp. Guys were hooking up with girls. Some of them had managed to sneak in alcohol and it was being shared on the far side of camp. There was talk of drugs, I'm sure, though I never saw any. The outside of the dorms was a grassed area and from my bottom bunk I could see, through the door, people running around outside. The adults had retired and we had claimed the night.

Well, I say we, but I certainly wasn't one of them. Being an old, grumpy man at the age of 15, I hand't moved from my bed at all. I sat quietly, talking and whatnot, like some kind of absurd sleepover but the truth was that I was getting tired and just wanted to sleep. This business of being a teenager, breaking the rules, chasing girls and whatnot was of no interest to me whatsoever. I remember sitting in bed with my arms folded and frowning at the whole thing. The image of this in my mind still makes me chuckle. How completely absurd I am.

So then Laura comes into the dorm. Her name isn't Laura, but we'll call her that. (Many people had been coming and going by this point, and the guy in the bunk above me had two year 12 girls in bed with him, though nothing was happening.) Laura was an awkward but pretty girl who was tall and blonde. She had eyes that seemed to sparkle and a nervous smile. Her cheeks flushed red. She was the kind of girl who hung around with the stoners. A group of guys who were obsessed with The Doors and The Who. I didn't listen to any commercial music at this point, I mostly listened to classical music or film and TV scores- but we'll go into that later. The guys in her group were actually ok guys, they didn't really bully anyone was such, they were just rough. And you know, into drugs, stealing and god knows what else such people get into. Actually, one of them was uncommonly friendly and I have nothing bad to say about him. He was just a hippy, really. But anyway, this was Laura's crowd. Laura was in my form, so I kind of saw her every day although we barely spoke. She had been in my English class the year before and sat nearby. My file was plastered with pictures from Doctor Who (which back then was so absolutely unheard of by people my age I was constantly harassed about it.) She commented that she'd been named after a character from Dr.Who. (Her real name, not the fake name I am using here.) She was always nice to me, and to my friend in that class. Laura was the kind of girl I really had nothing bad to say about. She played the trumpet, I believe, which is why she was at this camp.

Now let me take you back a little bit. Saturday night at camp, but long before we'd gone to bed. We'd had some kind of.. jesus I don't know what you'd call it. An event in the camps main hall. One of those school things which isn't quiote a party, but music does eventually get played and it's casual with games and whatnot. As the night edged on a DJ came out and started playing music. It was then we began to "Snowball." I don't know if this is an Australian thing, but a Snowball is usually held at discos and whatnot when you're in school. I can't quite remember the specifics, but it usually starts with one boy and one girl who more or less ballroom/slow dance for a few minutes. Then the music stops and each picks another partner. Laura was second or third, I believe, to be chosen. Quite early on, anyway. When the time came for her to pick a partner she went straight to me- much to my bewilderment and surprise. I remember, being lanky, uncoordinated, tall, nervous and awkward. I also remember her telling me to loosen up and relax. I endured this, figured she was just being the nice person she always was and thought nothing more on it, despite a few people from the crowd jeering how Daniel has an admirer and whatnot. This went on all night and I dismissed it. Remember, for me such a thing was entirely impossible, so I never considered it could happen.

Fast forward to when the teachers were asleep and the teenagers had taken over camp. In came Laura. She stood next to my bunk and chatted to us. She told us more stories about what was going on around the camp. (I never got out of bed, or left the dorm at ANY point.) I can't remember what else we really said, all of us in the dorm, but I know she must have been there for three or four minutes before one of the teachers came bursting through the door. To this day I am amazed at her speed, agility and quick thinking and wonder if she'd done this sort of thing before. Laura instantly leapt onto my bed, crawled into the covers, over me and hid under the covers behind me, against the wall. My first thought was this:
"Blast. She's going to get me into so much trouble."
So I rolled over and pretended to sleep. I do this masterfully and even have a little snore I can do which sounds utterly convincing. The teacher was startled and frankly, somewhat impressed by the guy above me with the two year 12s in his bed. All three were taken out and got into serious trouble. Luckily this seemed to distract him from really looking around the dorm too much. Also, the teacher probably saw me asleep and figured I was just that dorky kid, so no trouble there. One thing I'll never forget however, was having her under the bed, the warmth of her close to my body whilst she giggled uncontrollably, her hand covering her mouth so as to stifle them. When the teacher left she emerged unscathed. We marvelled at her quick thinking. She continued the theme by escaping out the back window.

Monday morning I came walking into form class, first thing in the morning. I passed Laura, sitting at her table with her friends. They all looked at me expectedly and laughed.
'My Hero,' Laura said as I passed. I paused, confused, and looked down at them, before doing what I've always done in such situations. I shrugged and pretended it didn't happen, muttering a polite response and sitting at my desk, moving on with my life.

A week later my friend Doug, who was rather popular and very well connected at the school came up to me.
'What's going on between you and Laura?' he said with a huge grin on his face. The fellow was something of a womaniser and still is.
'Eh? Oh nothing she just hid in my bed.'
'Hid in your bed eh? eh?' he said.
'No, really. The teacher came in so she hid. That's it.'
'That's not what she's saying,' Doug said. I frowned.
'What do you mean?' I asked.
'She's telling a very different version of events.'
'Huh. What is she saying?' I asked.
'She's telling everyone that you two had sex.'
'Yeah right,' I say sarcastically. He looks at me seriously.
'No really. She's been doing it all week to everyone and anyone. Everybody is talking about it.'
'But.. that;s.. Doug, you do know that never happened, right?'
'If you say so then I believe you. But that girl is telling people that you both had sex. Daniel, I think she likes you. She's liked you for ages. Can't you tell?'
'Impossible,' I said. 'I'm not worried. Let people talk, they always do. I have my own life. I'm not one of them. I'll just ignore it.'

And so I did. I basically moved on with my life, convinced that Doug was wrong and that Laura really was just a nice girl who made up stories about us for reasons I can't comprehend. But the thing is, years later I looked back on this whole thing and I started to wonder. Maybe I'm wrong, but I really do think this girl had something of a cheesy high school crush on me. God only knows why. Honestly, I have no idea. But maybe it was true. Maybe, just once, somebody did see me that way. But we all do foolish things when we're young, right?

Song: "This Too Shall Pass," by OK Go.